Women fifty-plus are considered to be of prime cougar age. No, not the sleek, beautiful creatures that lurk the deserts and hills—and sometimes the suburban neighborhoods—around Arizona. The new definition of a cougar is a woman 40 years of age or older who pursues men who are at least 10 years her junior, although typically the age spread is greater.
Many older women who prefer to be with much younger men object to the term “cougar.” Says one fifty-five-year-old insurance adjuster from Phoenix, whom we’ll call “Jill,” “I think the term ‘cougar’ makes us sound like we’re out for a kill. I enjoy younger men. They make me feel young and sexy and they have more energy than many men my age. Despite the age difference, we have a lot to talk about. I sexdatenetwork.com”target=”_blank”rel=”external”title=”Get Laid Tonight!” >date young professionals, usually in their thirties, who are self-confident and know how to have a good time. Sometimes they pay and sometimes I do. We’re mature adults. So what’s wrong with that?”
Cougar or May/December?
The concept of a cougar is not new, although the term is a recent addition to the language. Those who remember Mrs. Robinson (Anne Bancroft) in The Graduate saw a cougar in action, although that certainly was not the term used back then. And today’s younger men typically enter such relationships in a much more worldly fashion than did the initially naïve Benjamin (Dustin Hoffman). Theirs was a May/December relationship, although generally we think of an older man/younger woman when that term is used.
Indeed, people generally don’t think twice about an older man dating or marrying a younger woman. Why are we suddenly making a big deal out of the opposite scenario? There are certainly some very respectable celebrity “cougars” we can turn to, including Mary Tyler More and Robert Levine (18 year difference), Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher (15 year difference), and Barbara Hershey and Naveen Andrews (21 years).
Despite the negative image and terminology that has been assigned to older women who have an intimate relationship with a much younger man, not all such relationships involve a “cougar” and her “prey.” Many are like “Jill,” mature women who are honest about what they want and who have decided they are going to go out and get it. These behaviors are not new, but they are more visible and, perhaps slowly, becoming more acceptable.
